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The Poacher Express
The Poacher Express is a HTFF episode where Poachy goes to the north pole to kill Santa Claus. Plot In his cottage, Poachy is cooking poisonous cookies in his oven. As he prepares to kill Santa Claus, he looks at all the traps he had set out. Suddenly, he realizes that his house chimney is way too small and Santa can't possibly come. A flying magical train appears, driven by Swannie. Swannie says that the train leads to the north pole as the train takes flight. But Poachy forgets to turn the oven off as well as the other lights. In the air, Poachy begins pumping up is BB gun, while Mole shovels coals into the furnace. However, he accidentally scoops out the burning coals which end up landing on Swannie's face and begin burning her, causing her to crash the train. Later, Poachy climbs out of the train rubble and notices that he is at the north pole. He then notices how protected Santa's workshop is, so he disguises as an elf (by killing one) to impress the security. In Santa's workshop, Poachy asks the elves where he can find Santa, but the elves say he has to work extra good to see him. He groans as he begins putting button eyes on teddy bears, then he gets an idea. He throws one of the buttons into a machine where the button clogs the gears. It ends up breaking the machine and causes it to go haywire. The elves are confused as the machine ends up shooting up toy bikes automatically which crush a lot of the elves. One of the bikes end up breaking off a lever, causing the conveyor belts to go out of control and end up scrapping off the elves' arms. The presents end up piling out and eventually fall over and crush the remaining elves. Santa Claus comes by and sees that all the elves are dead except for one, Poachy. So, he invites him over to his office. In Santa's office, Santa asks Poachy how he can do his business with only one elf. But Poachy ends up pulling out a gun, shooting Santa and causing him to fall out of the office where he gets impaled on the north pole's marker pole. Poachy is about to kill Santa when the scene suddenly cuts to show Poachy's house on fire due to him leaving the oven on. The smoke travels all its way to the north pole, ends up causing global warning, and in turn causes the north pole to melt. Santa tries to get up but a whale ends up knocking him over as well as the pole he is impaled on. Due to the north pole's pole being upside-down, this ends up causing geomagnetic reversal which results in total world destruction. Moral "Don't use too much acquired electricity." Deaths *Swannie is burnt by coals. *Mole either died from the train crash or the world ending. *An elf is skinned to death. *The elves are crushed to death. *Poachy and Santa Claus drown. *Everyone on Earth dies due to geomagnetic reversal. Trivia *This episode is a reference to The Polar Express. *Swannie's death is similar to Pop's death in "Pop's BBQ Smoochie: Light". Category:Christmas Episodes Category:Season 85 episodes Category:Episodes with no survivors Category:Fan Episodes